翻译或撰写英文学术文章时,可以透过以下策略来提升文章品质。
避免用词重复
撰写论文时,内文需要清楚易懂,用词要精简准确,尽量避免不必要的重复用词。例如:
中文原文:本研究采用横断面与纵断面之两项研究 。
英文翻译:This study adopted both cross-sectional and longitudinal studies.
在译句中,“study”在句首和句尾各出现一次,显得冗赘,因此可以将第二个“study”替换成“research design”,如下:
英文改句:This study adopted both cross-sectional and longitudinal research designs.
避免使用冗赘的词汇
简明达义的字词非常重要,若出现过多的冗言赘字,整体语气也会降低许多。例如:
中文原文:刚生产的妇女,因对新生儿的陌生感、育儿经验不足,对于能否胜任母亲角色感到无助。
英语翻译:The primipara was unfamiliar with having a newborn in her family, lacked the skills required to raise her child, and felt helpless in fulfilling her maternal roles.
原文里并没有提到家庭一词,因此译句中:“having a newborn in her family”读起来略显冗长,可以将此处修正成:“caring for a newborn”更贴近原文。同样的,“skills required to raise her child” 可改成 “required parenting skills” 或 “childrearing skills”等来减少冗赘。如下:
英语改句:The primipara was unfamiliar with caring for a newborn, lacked the required parenting skills, and felt helpless in fulfilling her maternal role.
避免句子冗长
一般而言,英文句子长度不益超过40个单词,否则句子太长会导致读者的注意力分散而影响对整个句子的理解。例如:
中文原文:此外,医护人员提供的健康教育,必须教导高风险工作者关注自身健康,视健康高于工作,保持有益健康的锻炼,因而提高他们的工作效率和财务状况。
英文翻译:Additionally, health education provided by healthcare personnel must teach high-risk workers to pay more attention to their health, prioritize their health over work, and practice health maintenance behavior, thereby allowing them to improve their job performance and financial well-being.
此英文译句共包含39个单词,非常接近建议的上限,稍显冗长且需要改写。最常见的改写方式是将长句改写成短句,例如将“thereby”改成 由“This allows”引导的另一个句子:
英文改句:Additionally, health education provided by healthcare personnel must teach high-risk workers to pay more attention to their health, prioritize their health over work, and practice health maintenance behavior. This allows them to improve their job performance and financial well-being.
避免歧义
不当的文法结构可能带来句意的歧义,其中又以“with”的错误用法最为常见:
中文原文:本研究采用问卷调查法,了解消费者行为与消费满意度。
英文翻译:This study examined consumer behaviors and satisfaction with a questionnaire survey.
在英文译句中,“with”是接在“satisfaction”后面,很可能被错误解读成:“本研究试图了解消费者行以及他们对问卷调查的满意度”,与原句的意思完全不同。为避免使读者误会,建议将“with”拿掉,并将“questionnaire survey”作为句子宾语。
英文改句:This study adopted a questionnaire survey to examine consumer behaviors and satisfaction.